My lonely world
by ilovemanga63
Summary: You think that you are alone, that your existence in the world is meaningless. That is until you meet Arthur, and he shows you just how much you are needed, at least in his world. England X Reader


You sigh as your (e/c)eye's stare blankly at the wall of your bedroom. Most people your age would be out partying and celebrating about not having to do anymore homework, you should be chilling with your friends or getting drunk at clubs. You however, were currently perched on your computer chair in your room, contemplating the meaning of life and your reason for existence. You had recently finished school which, to most people, would be a blessing. However you always despised the thought of leaving school. It's not like you enjoyed all the homework and exams, but it prevented you from feeling depressed and empty at home when you thought about how your existence in the world was meaningless. Sighing again, you opened up your laptop which sat on the desk in front of you. After it loaded you opened up your Facebook page to see if you could find anything to distract you from your wandering mind.

Surprise surprise! The very first post you came across was from a girl who you recognized from school, stating how great some party was and bragging about how drunk she got. Followed by pictures of her and some other people from school. Now, you were never one to get jealous or envy someone else's life, certainly not that of someone who wastes their life outside of school drinking and kissing people they probably don't even know, but as you skimmed through the pictures, you couldn't help but feel envious. I mean sure, you were responsible, you wouldn't ever waste your life drinking and kissing strangers, but at least these people had the confidence to get out there. You on the other hand were a miserable shut in who only had about 4 friends, 3 of whom were busy preparing for college and following their dreams, you didn't even know what your dream was. Your other friend was still in school, as she was two years younger than you, and at the moment she was on holiday somewhere in another country. You let out another sigh, your mind thinking back on how unsociable you were in school, and still are. You were never really good at making friends, in your first year of secondary school if anyone tried to speak to you in class you would assume they were going to make fun of you and tell them to "F*** off"

Your 1st friend (best friend's name) , you had known since nursery, you couldn't remember how you became friends, it has just always been that way. Even today, she is the person you would go to if you needed support, although at this moment in time it was not an option. She was the only friend you had ever made by yourself, the others, (friend's 2,3,4 names) you only met, or had the courage to talk to them because of her. You were glad to be friends with them however, they were the only thing besides school that distracted you from your depressing thoughts.

However, as mentioned before, they were not an option at the moment, so you ended up just continuously scrolling through Facebook, trying to drown out your thoughts. It didn't work, if anything you felt worse after seeing pictures of your former classmates having fun. _Why am I friends with these people anyway? _you thought , _it's not like I ever talked to most of them, and now we're out of school I have even less of a reason to interact with them_.

"UURGGGG" You groaned as you slammed your laptop shut and began to pace around your room with your headphones on. You always did this when nothing else worked, imagining different scenarios in your head including your favorite characters from anime as you played fitting music and paced around. Most of the time the anime characters would be in their own world, other times you'd cross them into some other dimension, for example Lucy heartfilia from fairy tail would take Edward Elric's place in Full-metal Alchemist. This helped most of the time, but when you were feeling at your lowest you'd imagine the characters were in the room with you, cheering you on and threatening those who dimmed your already low self-esteem. However sometimes this wasn't such a good idea, as on more than one occasion you have found yourself laughing at Ed's antics only to be brought back into reality and find that you had laughed out loud and people stared at you, finding you creepy.

You had come a long way since your first year in secondary though. You wouldn't swear at people as much until you knew they were definitely taking the piss. You talked more in class to people who you knew weren't prats. However on a few occasions you would resort to violence with certain people. For example, in one lesson a boy, who had been getting on your nerves since day one, hugged you from behind to, in your mind, make fun of you. Your reaction was to elbow him in the ribs, hard. Needless to say he looked to be in a lot of pain, not like you cared.

"_!" The voice of your mother boomed up the stairs, signalling that she was home from work.

"What!?" You were in no mood to go and talk to her, and you couldn't be bothered leaving your room.

"Have you been in your room all day!?" She did not seem pleased as her head popped through the now open door.

"No," You began, "I went down stairs to get a drink"

"Jesus Christ _, Your not in school anymore, you should be out there making something of yourself instead of keeping yourself hauled up in your room all day!"

"Hun," You replied with a grunt, "Whatever."

"Don't _whatever_ me! Just get out of this house and do something, _anything!_ Go hang out with your friends!" She sighed in annoyance as she waited for your response.

"Yeah, whatever" You really couldn't be bothered explaining that all of your friends were busy so you just dismissed her, hoping she would leave as she was really getting on your nerves, as always.

Your mother gave up and left your room, muttering "lazy git".

She just didn't understand the fact that you did not like interacting with others, leaving your comfort zone. You were perfectly fine when your friends were around, some would even say you were like a completely different person, acting hyper and laughing constantly about your favorite shows and youtubers.

After slamming the door to your bedroom, you picked a black jacket out with a panda hood from your wardrobe, and proceeded to put on your trainers. You didn't care how you looked most of the time, as long as you were clean and every inch of your body, aside from your face, was covered you were perfectly fine.

Making your way down stairs after grabbing a book "The book of lost things" you made your way to the door. However before you could escape the hell that was your living room, the most irritating voice that had ever reached your ears pulled you to a halt.

"Where are you going?" It was your little brother, younger than you by five years.

"None of your business," You once again reached for the doorknob only to be yelled at by your mother.

"Don't be rotten _! He was only asking!"

"Yeah, _!" He joined in with a mocking tone.

"Well I can't stand the sound of his voice!" You retorted, before promptly opening the door and slamming it behind you.

You kept your head down as you walked, a habit that you had never been able to break out of. Your mother had often scolded you for not looking where you were going but you took no notice. However at this point in time that would prove to be a very big mistake.

You stepped out onto the road, headphones in, music on full blast as always. You were usually careful, however in this moment you were too irritated and was careless. As you made your way across the road, the loud horn went completely unnoticed. You were too engrossed in your imaginary world, you didn't see the car quickly approaching, seconds away from smashing into your side. You smiled to yourself as you imagined Ed badmouthing your mother, whilst Alphonse tried to calm him down, they were completely oblivious too.

You were taken by surprise when a hand suddenly latched itself around your waist and pulled you back onto the curb. The car drove past, the driver, who was not pleased, sticking his middle finger up at you. Too shocked to move, you just stared at the place where she once stood. After a few seconds you became aware of the arm still wrapped securely around your waist. Startled, you pushed yourself away and glared at the person who had interrupted your imaginary conversation with Ed and Al.

You didn't even bother to take in his appearance and the slight worry on his face before shouting at him, "What the hell are you doing?!"

Clearly taken aback, the mans soft, worried expression turned to irritation, "What do you mean, _what the hell are you doing?!_, I just saved your life you bloody ungrateful wanker!"

You couldn't retort, it was true, he had just saved you from being run over. But that didn't change the fact that he had just ruined your sanctuary.

"I didn't need saving! I don't give a damn if I do get run over!" You glared back at him, expecting to get caught in a death-glare contest , _of which you were very good at_, only to be struck by beautiful emerald eyes widening at your words. You thought the urge to blush as he leaned closer, his golden hair brushing over his forehead as his thick eyebrows furrowed.

"Your not serious are you?" All traces of irritation was now gone as he waited for your response.

You found it hard to respond, _were you serious?_ The words had just spilled out in the spur of the moment. But would you care? Sure it would be painful, but it would give you an excuse to be able to escape from reality, even if only temporarily. Maybe it could even be permanent?

You instinctively brought your hand up to cover your mouth, as if you had just spoken those words aloud. Did you really just think all that?

"Hello?" The voice of the stranger that had just saved your life was filled with concern as he prompted you to respond.

You didn't want to respond though, you were too scared by your own thoughts to reply to his question, so instead you just resorted back to how you used to deal with people before, "F*** you!"

Without even bothering waiting for him to respond, you dashed across the road, hoping he wouldn't follow as you made your way to your original destination.

**Re-uploaded this chapter because I wanted to change the book that was picked up ^_^ chapter 2 will be up soon **


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